Here
are the complete listing of ROGERS 22 "best of" episodes shown in Toronto
(97-98). They are collections of the best segments and moments from the original
shows that were shown in Ottawa.
Rogers Television hired show director Ray Hagel to take elements and highlights
from the original Ottawa one hour episodes, and create 7 one hour episodes
spanning the shows 3 year run.
1. Wrestlers (Phil & Derek) -Intro- Embarrass Sarah (the floor director) -The Internet (bread)- Flowered Rug- Stereo Giggles- Wrestlers (what is going on here!)- Celebrity Watching- Keeping Fit- The guy who goes UhHhh (1976)- Physics bum- Sk8 city- Derek covered in donuts- The Canoe Trip- Beating up Tom- Harassing people -burning Humpliks shirt- Rumble in the byward- old lady- dubbing voices- toilet paper- spot the water tower- da funky Humplik rap- Tom is DA pimp player-
HIGHLIGHTS FROM SHOW ONE INCLUDED
Stereo
Giggles
(Tom
encounters a woman who cant stop laughing. Closeups of her laughing are looped,
and gradually zoomed in on her teeth.)
Celebrity Watching
(One of the funniest moments, a young man and his mother walk the streets of
Ottawa. He looks like dead cult leader from Waco Texas: David Koresh, and she
looks like the old woman from "Throw Mama from the train".. starring
Billy Crystal and Danny Devito)
Keeping Fit (Tom introduces us all to the
world of being physically fit. We see Tom working out in the basement of his
parents house, where he works on his tri ceps and biceps, as well as eating
a bunch of skin cream. Tom over exhearts himself and screams each time he does
the various activities. Toms dad comes downstairs and tells him to move his
car.. he screams more)
2. Broken Humplik's glasses (revenge of the nerds)- Intro- Talking with Glenn- Wooden boys- Tom running around in the streets- Get rid of the body- Follow the porn- The History of Pottery/Porcelain- Pick up your garbage!- French Clowns- Street sign hidden- Guitar guy- Cardboard!- Posters/Wallers- Humplik: Insurance Adjuster- Rapping with Phil- Yellow sweater lady- Hairstyles for men- the people we meet (flaming heads)- Clever Trevor- Feed my tumor- weird photographs- rogers promo
HIGHLIGHTS FROM SHOW TWO INCLUDED
Follow the Porn (a game created
by Tom and Derek, placing a pornographic magazine on a highway, and each player
claims a side of the road, when the porn blows over to that players side.. the
other is the winner)
French Clowns (Tom and Derek record a comedy
skit in French. They both speak poor French... if you have taken grade 3 french
in your life time you will under stand the level of French they speak.). "Mon
ami cest fache.. "
Humplik:
Insurance Adjuster
(At one time Glenn worked for the Ottawa fire department doing insurance adjusting.
In this segment Glenn dresses up like a fireman, and goes into a simulated burning
building to rescue a dummy (tom), when the segment is over and humplik stops
swearing he sits down to eat in the kitchen of the firestation, then dresses
in a fire suit and gets blasted by a fire hose)
3. Skate boarding rogers disclaimer- Intro- Cafeteria fun- driving around- coffee shop fun- Burger King Humplik- UFO's- Humplik/Tom pizza guy ambush- bear is gonna kill me- screaming/skateboarding- Mcdougall twins- Follow me Glenn (Glenn falls into the water)- Tom dies on street- Sprint champion- The magic box- Giving people drives- restaurant shootup- Bon Jovi at 3am- Ridau/Emvale shopping center- Tom Green dance circus (move it move it)- Street fun- running around car- Gaeton the Poetry Shovel
HIGHLIGHTS FROM SHOW
THREE INCLUDED
Burger
King Humplik ( During a show intro Tom leaves the rogers studios,
and heads next door to Burger King to order a burger.. on the way he tells customers
that he is going to get something to eat. At the counter Tom becomes impatient
and demands that a young man serving fries help him; the young man turns out
to be Glenn Humplik who works at Burger King (the truth is revealed)
Tom dies on the street (While the scene
is filmed from across the street on the roof, Tom walks by a busy section of
street, and lies down playing dead. People initially stop and look, but eventually
a crowd gathers with people calling for help etc.. Tom eventually gets up and
walks away saying nothing
4. The Tom Green
Segment Special -Redau canal hockey jumper- Turbot war- rumble in the byward-
Treasure island theory- The Canoe trip- Human league dance- rooftop singalong-
3am friends for Tom's dad- weird guy- The
pineapple (intro)- Mcdougall twins- 3am bagpipes- fight with Glenn- Scent
posts- dog walks by- Vaseline eyes- 15 on a pole- Biological crossfire- Celebrity
watching- Talking about Mike harris- Shaving Cream/toothpaste weird Tom- Giving
people drives- Glenn & Tom hanging in the coffee shop- Humplik running naked-
5.Germans care disclaimer- Derek's
toilet- The search for C.H.U.D.- creamy
hands- celebrity watching- Bag of milk in
my pants- Talking about Mike Harris -Gloucester Leprechauns- autumn leaves-
old people- Derek's toilet- Derek taking dumps- Emvale shopping fun (garbage
and Hi kid)- Letter from Derek (smacking head)- Toms raft story- April wine
concert- my skin feels soft Glenn- ordering food without a car- bug interview-
tourists in Ottawa- Longest message ever left on an answering machine- Tom's
Christmas special- You guys are great- pop can fun- Laughing guy- I outta ring
your neck- Phil/Glenn's techno beat- Bread head- Toms drumming (the Brook)-
Coffee for breakfast- Christmas special 2
HIGHLIGHTS
FROM SHOW FIVE INCLUDED
Gloucester
Leprechauns ( Tom and Derek dress up as Irish Leprechauns and hide
out in Gloucester Hydro park. When cars drive by and are stopped at a red light,
the leprechauns run out and dance around while the cars honk at them. The end
of the segment Tom and Derek dance around a young man who passes by the park...
he too honks)
The Tom Green Show Christmas Special (Just
what it says, Tom has a christmas spectacular on the show. He talks to himself,
having various conversations including: Buying pancake mix at the dollar store
(then pouring it on himself), talking about people who live on an island who
have sold out since they own a windmill, and finally pouring water on his face
and trashing the set.. )
Pop can fun (Tom has hours of entertainment
while playing with a single pop can on the streets of Ottawa. He plays and plays,
and in the meantime harrases some women and the public)
6. Glenn
eats 12 donuts disclaimer- Intro- Tom & Phil fight crime on the streets- 3rd
Tom Green segment ever (rooftop dance)- covered with flour- the basement sessions-
Letter from Derek (waxie)- Lucien Buchard isnt in the mood to joke- Turbot war-
Songs from the basement (donkey, British smoking song)- The mom song- have you
got a problem?- Subway guy (the snake)- Tom & Glenn's first date information-
Its my kinda MEAT- James bond car- Glass eye interview (peekaboo)- Searching
for Ottawa's biggest idiot- People we meet (the Indian guy)- Car stuff- Promo-
Skiing on bread- I wanna buy a bag- pretty boy Glenn gets more sleep than Tom-
Detergent on Tom- Looking for the Antlers of the Humpliks
HIGHLIGHTS
FROM SHOW SIX INCLUDED
Glenn eats
12 donuts intro/dislclaimer (The guys have a donut eating contest
before the shows disclaimer, Hump stuffs his face .. and the final score becomes:
Glenn 12 donuts. Tom one donut. and Phil 2 donuts. Granted Tom and Phil were
to busy laughing at Glenn to eat..)
3rd show
Segment ever (basically Tom plays around on a rooftop in Ottawa,
almost falling off a few times. He interviews some people asking if they were
afraid of heights.. and the talest building they had ever been on. The segment
is cool because its the third segment ever
Hockey Guy (Dressed as Hockey Guy, Tom interviews
Quebec Leader Lucien Bouchard. Tom asks if the Quebec Nordiques will be seperating
from Canada.. he replies "Oh its a joke.. im not in the mood to joke.."
then that phrase is looped about 8 times. Another scene shows Tom jumping off
an olympic sized diving board into a pool.. in full hockey gear
Covered with Flour (Tom and Glenn discuss
how to become a member of the studio audience. Its free. Its one 3rd as entertaining
as a movie.. what a bargain! Introduction to the basement sessions)
7. There was an episode
that started with Trevor, and Darcy talking backwards.. I didnt get a chance
to tape it when it was originally played. However I will tape it next time I
can. I know you are sad, but lets talk about something to fill in this space.
Nothing really stands out in this episode, I think maybe they played some of
the above stuff. But if Im wrong, its a shame. It doesnt look like they will
ever be playing these again, so Ill have to get this episode off a friend that
I know who has it.. he isnt a big tom green fan anymore, so I hope he didnt
tape over it
