Season One

1. Kiss Me Steph- The classic first episode ever! (not counting the kids of Degrassi street.) Just the fact that this is the first episode makes this an instant classic.. so everyone should know this episode like the back of their hand. Stephanie Kaye.. the legend (and name sake of this episode) returns to Degrassi after taking some summer trip. This is gonna be a big year for Stephanie.. She gives Voula (her best friend) a nice present from her trip (a bracelet), and proceeds to strip and turn into hooker-mode in the Degrassi bathroom. Voula is shocked! (Steph sure was NOT like this the year before). Meanwhile, Joey Jeremiah greets Arthur (because he is the chairman of the welcoming committee.. and Arthur who is new at Degrassi.. not to mention Stephanie Kaye's brother) and instead of taking him to Miss Avery's class, Joey decides to lock him in the janitor's closet (Joey has help from some guy that will never been seen in Degrassi again..). Stephanie and Voula decide that it would be good for Stephanie to run for school president, Voula ends up doing all the work.. Stephanie does nothing. Check out Snake in the background of this episode! He is wearing a vintage Iron Maiden t-shirt.. coooool. Yick lets Arthur out of the janitor room, and their friendship begins. This episode is also JAM PACKED with screw-ups. Just before Arthur and Yick arrive late for Miss Avery's class, she takes roll call.. first of all the room is for grade 7's, and one of the twins is clearly visible. "Stacy Farrell"? who the hell is that? But Erica says "here" so.. I guess back then her name was Stacy. Also during next class (Mr. Raditch) guess who is sitting in front of Stephanie... why its LIZ! (who actually comes later on in the Degrassi year as a "new" student.. weird"). Back to the episode, well during the campaign stuff.. Stephanie gives out kisses for votes, Snake is in the background jamming on his guitar saying "Vote for me!" or something.. at first its a guitar and bass, but later on drums and stuff come in (wow.. snake is talented, playing all those instruments through his one guitar). Stephanie ends up winning by a landslide, and later at the victory speech, ends up thanking Joey over Voula.. and this makes Voula upset. Stephanie and Arthur make up at the end of this episode as they walk towards their separate homes (at the start of the episode she said she didnt want to talk to him while they were both going to the same school.)

2. The Big Dance- Stephanie and Voula continue their feud from the past episode, and we see that a big dance is being planned for Degrassi (the annual Degrassi fall dance). The school is supporting a foster child and they all want to get some money to pay for the foster child(s braces).. so the class decides that everyone will pay one dollar to get into the dance, then the cheque will be presented at the dance (by Voula.. but actually she cant go to the dance! her dad wont let her.. shes too young, she might get fondled). Voula decides to go over her fathers helmet and go to the dance after Lucy shares her wisdom of "raising parents" with Voula. Joey brags to Wheels about going to the dance with Stephanie..but it turns out that Stephanie actually wants to go with Wheels instead.. Steph asks Wheels out, and poor Joey gets all sad. The twins and Steph all go over to Lucys before the dance, and get loaded (they drink all of the booze).. the twins actually encouraged this behavior after noticing that Lucy's parents have quite the home bar gooing on. The twins admit that they have been drunk before (erotic) and were previously drunk at their cousins house. Stephanie lies about being drunk before, and drinks way too much..gets totally blitzed and ends up barfing at the dance.. strangely enough the twins encourage Steph to drink! (wow how could my EROTIC twins be such bad seeds?). Voula (who has managed to sneek out to attend the dance..) is about to present the cheque for the foster kid(s new Nike's) when her father comes in! talk about over bearing, he actually crashes the Degrassi dance and didnt even bother to pay the cover charge of a dollar to get in ! OHHNOO! she gets in deep shit. Detention until 30. TID BIT: This is actually the first episode I saw of Degrassi.. on 16mm film back in Grade 7 guidance class. 

3. The Experiment- Raditch really sticks it to Yick in this episode.. I believe that he is a little too cruel to Mr. Yu the disorganized (Yick thinks he gets picked on too much also). Arthur tries out for the basketball team.. but he really really sucks ass (he cant even hit the hoop!).. Shane and the rest of the cool kids call poor Arthur "Artie Smartie". Yick is really good at basketball, but not so hot at school.. so they decide that Arthur will help Yick with school, if Yick helps Arthur with basketball. Melanie and Kathleen are shown to be friends (their first major episode together) and Melanie talks of how she is sad that junior high doesnt have drugs and other such fun things.. she says that she wants to try drugs (ooh). Meanwhile, Arthur and Yick decide to conduct an experiment.. using Arthur's sister (Stephanie) old school work from the previous year (that got a good mark), Yick will take that paper and hand it in, seeing what kinda mark Raditch will give him based on who he is alone. Joey overhears Melanie talking about drugs, so he decides to sell the girls drugs that are really just "vitamins". The girls pretend to get high for some retarded reason.. and cause a ruckus in the school. Soon after the 2 get "stoned" off the vitamins.. more kids want to get stoned, including the no named token wheelchair girl (no not Maya). All of the druggie kids hear Joey bragging about how he sold them vitamins, and they get mad.. demanding their money back. Joey is chased through the halls, and bringing up the angry mob is.. you guessed it.. the wheelchair girl (NOT IT'S NOT MAYA!). Yick gets in trouble for stealing Stephs paper (and making Mr. Raditch out to look like a Narbo), but after a detention Yick gets a good mark on some project.

4. The Cover-Up-Joey needs a cool looking jean jacket for when he gets his school pictures taken, because his old one was destroyed by his mommy. Rick overhears this and asks Joey if he wants to buy his old jean jacket for 10 bucks. Sure! says Joey and they go over to Ricks house ("Great place man" Joey says!.. Joey is a good liar, truth is, Rick's place is a total dump!) It just so happens that Rick's dad likes to beat Rick up.. it also so happens that Rick's dad enjoys a nice cold pop when he gets home from work, and unfortunately for Rick, he offered one of the last ones to Joey... so when the dad arrives home to find a missing pop, and Rick, he lets the abusive fists fly.. Joey runs out of the place all shocked. The next day Rick shows up at school all bruised, and Joey tells his 'best friend' for of all of 2 episodes Tim about knowing someone who gets beaten up by his dad. Joey then tells Doris Bell that he knows someone getting beaten by his dad, and this makes Doris think that that someone Joey knows is infact JOEY! the horror! So Doris.. that crazy old bag calls the local social worker and tattletales on Joey's parents. Upon arriving at Joeys house with Rick (who has come to collect his money for the jean jacket) the social worker who looks like an 80's Duran Duran reject sees that the person he is really looking for is actually Rick. Rick gets all tough, I guess he thinks he is tough because of that "cool" bicycle he rides.. but anyways the social worker says he wants to help Rick, and finally Rick agrees. The end

5. The Great Race-This certainly is one of the most entertaining Degrassi episodes ever made. Melanie faces a problem that every girl must deal with once in their lives (she has no boobs). Melanie checks herself out in the mirror to see how much cleavage she has ( zero ). L.D tells her that she looks fine (and even goes as far as saying that Melanie needs a bra!) so the two go shopping for bras and are obviously high because they are laughing and having a great time shopping for bras (its so much fun to shop for bras!). Meanwhile the girls swim team win their race and get to the school finals.. everyone is excited about the girls winning the championship.. except for all of the boys at Degrassi Junior High. The girls are pissed that the sports rep for DJH Jason Cox (a guy who was in a few episodes then was abducted) wont accept the fact that girls are good at sports too. The boys and girls decide to have a swimming race to decide who is the best.. but the boys need some help! they ask Snake to join the swim team (even though to qualify for the boys swim team you have to be apart of the boys soccer team for some retarded reason). The boys all make fun of Melanie because of her new and strangely stuffed wonder bra.. even resident bad seed Alex Yankou pulls on the back of her bra strap. This is also the first episode that Melanie expresses her true feelings for Snake (she says that she likes him..tee hee). The girls end up not having Melanie race for them because she is upset about her breasts being small in a bathing suit.. but then she decides to swim, and Joey makes fun of her.. L.D then throws Joey in the water for making fun. The girls win the swim meet.. horray!.

6. Rumor Has It-This has to be one of the first on screen references to lesbianism I had ever seen in my life (not counting the magical videos I watched at my cousin Ben's house..)It starts out with Caitlin having a very erotic dream about Miss Avery.. Caitlin sits on Avery's lap and soaks up the compliments of writing a very good paper on aboriginal mating habits (or something), and then she wakes up all hot and covered with sweat.. saying "NO" (but did she really mean yes?) Back at Degrassi some girls (Kathleen, Melanie, Susie, and some no name chick who only appeared in this episode) are talking about how Miss Avery is a lesbian, and how its bad. Caitlin defends Miss Avery, but the girls evidence is overwhelming (Miss Avery holds hands on the street with another woman! oooh). The dreams continue for Caitlin, the entire class calls her a dyke.. lezzie.. homosexual (you name it.. ) and Caitlin begins to think that something is seriously wrong with her. Meanwhile Yick looses 20 bucks that he needed to buy sneakers with (wow.. talk about el cheepie brand).. and Arthur suddenly thinks that since he did a project on crime prevention that he can be a private investigator (ahh to be young and retarded again..) Sherlock Arthur deduces that Rick the resident bad seed stole the money.. due to his previous thefts. Turns out that Rick won the lottery (kids cant gamble.. but this is Degrassi remember) and instead of buying something cool (like a decent bike or hair cut) Rick spends all his money of Licorice! .. first of all, who the hell eats licorice, and second of all why give out a piece to every kid at Degrassi!? Well hes a nice seed, but Arthur and Yick think that buy throwing away the free Licorice its a sign of guilt. At the end Yick finds out that his 20 bucks was buried all along under some old homework. Miss Avery talks to Caitlin and makes her feel better.. she is no longer a lesbian (Caitlin that is..)

7. The Best Laid Plans- Another classic episode. Wheels and Stephanie K are to go on a date.. a BIG date. Stephanie wants to show Wheels how much she likes him, and figures that means sex. Wheel's has been hearing rumors and figures he will be having sex as well. Let the games begin!. Wheels and Joey head off to the nearby drug store in search of condoms. Joey asks a question about the condoms to the woman working the counter (who is infact Stephanie K's mother!! EEP!) Wheels is left embarrassed and with a pamphlet on sex given by the worker/Stephanie's mom. Meanwhile, Yick has stolen a porn tape called "Swamp Sex Robots" off his older brother and brings it to school. Arthur cant believe it! "this is pornography!". It is Arthur. It is a magical piece of cinema. A plan is set in motion to watch the film at Arthur's, as his mom and Stephanie will be out on dates. During the final minutes of the episode, the excitement builds. Wheels has a talk to his dad about having sex, and is soon off on his date. He buys some flowers, and has a dumb smile on his face as he walks the streets ready to have sex. Stephanie and Arthur's mom is taking way to long.. she is gonna ruin Christmas for the duo who are up to no good. Stephanie retires to her room to get dressed in her standard "woman of the night" clothing. Stephanie's mom is busy getting dressed and asks Steph some advice on earrings. Arthur is preparing to watch pornography with a bunch of dudes (haha), and Wheels is on his way. But who is this! the wild card.. the date of the mother! It all plays out right in front of our eyes, Wheels and the Mom date even arrive at the same time both with flowers. Stephs mom recognizes Wheels as the kid who bought the condoms.. and Christmas is ruined as both dates are cancelled and Arthur is no longer able to watch porn.

8. Nothing to Fear- A wise man once said "There is nothing to fear, except when your mom died when you were little, and now your dad is in the hospital because he eats crap and smokes nonstop". I think that wise man was me! So poor L.D. Her character gets a little flushed out in this episode. We learn that when she was little, her mom died after going to a hospital.. and ever since then L.D has been afraid of hospitals. The class assigns groups of 3 to work on a project mapping the area of Toronto.. L.D, Spike and Voula need to map an area that includes a hospital. L.D makes it known that she doesnt like hospitals. When she comes home, she finds her dad had to go to the hospital.. something to do with his heart! Uhoh. L.Ds dad is a mechanic and has his own shop.. I believe he was forced to have a heart attack after dealing with Mr. Jeremiah's crappy car. L.D flakes out on Spike and Voula for the project, and the two girls say its typical L.D. Always an excuse! Insensitive bitches. L.D has a good excuse.. her dad is in the hospital! L.D forces herself to go pay a visit at the hospital and when she walks in.. she starts freaking out. She sees the East Indian female extra that so far has caught Lucy and Voula shoplifting, and checked on condom prices for Joey (in season 2..). In this episode she is being wheeled around on a gurney.. great acting! L.D gives some flowers to the receptionist as shes too freaked to take them up to her dad. She later calls her dad in the hospital to tell him that she couldnt come up.. she had a project! and the girls were waiting for her.. and she had to go. What a little fibber. The plan backfires later as the Spike and Voula (etc) bring flowers up to her dad in the hospital.. her dad says he understands that L.D. has been busy with the project. Ohh what a tangled web we weave. L.D has nothing to fear, her dad makes it out alive. L.D will eventually develop leukemia and again must face her fears in the hospital.

9. What A Night!- Wow what a mess a few of our Degrassi heroes get into in this episode. Lucy is a fashion icon at Degrassi (in her own mind) and of course Voula is totally impressed with what she has going on. The episode begins with Lucy stealing some hideous clothing from the long closed department store "Towers". Lucy is obviously not a shop lifting expert, and is drawing far too much attention to herself. Store security spots her, but for some reason lets her go. Lucy and Voula develop their friendship and bond over clothing. Voula helps Lucy with her school work. Voula wants to dress like Lucy because she is "sophisticated". Lucy dresses actually more like a bootleg Barbie doll you would find at a Dollar Store. None the less, Voula and Lucy venture out to shop at Towers. Voula has no money! but thats ok, Lucy has her own five finger discount that she uses instead of cash quite frequently. When Voula spots a top she likes, Lucy puts it into her bag. Voula tries to tell Lucy that it is wrong.. but Lucy does not want to hear it. They try to exit the store quickly, and get on the escalator that would lead them outside (i guess?) but they get caught by store security. Being 13 year old girls, they cant exactly outrun or punch the weak security guard in the balls.. so they go down for the count. Remember Voula's dad getting upset that she went to a dance? He is PISSED that she shoplifted. Lucy plays it cool.. saying they will get off with a warning. As it turns out, Lucy has been caught before.. and has a record. This time she will be charged. Another side plot involves the erotic twins and Stephanie K. Apparently there is a great soap opera that everyone watches at Degrassi for this one episode only. The main star of the show is a guy who looks like a demented Kurt Browning (see bios for details). Stephanie finds out that this guy will be appearing at a book signing. The Degrassi prop department out does itself with fake copies of the guys books. It looks like they photocopied an 8 year olds hand drawn piece of paper and wrapped a few books up to make it look like they were legit. Stephanie and the Twins are just in time. Demented Kurt Browning is signing autographs, and Stephanie goes up to try to meet him. She doesnt have money (she left it in her other pants..) but thats ok, he signs her piece of paper. He has a policy though.. one autograph.. one kiss. Being impressed by Stephanie's missing tooth, and lipstick, he gives her a great kiss. The girls exit as Stephanie proclaims that she will never wash her cheek again. But what is this? a phone number! Who does this guy think he is! He has given Stephanie his phone number. Smooth. Later Stephanie calls him up and arranges for a date. Heather doesnt like it. She doesnt even know him! Erica thinks its great. Stephanie meets up with Demented Kurt Browning guy, and they take off in his "so cool" Corvette. After a little driving, he gets tired and pulls into a motel parking lot... just to talk and rest. He puts the moves on Stephanie, and Steph jumps out of the car freaked out. Im only 14! - The guy jumps into his car and burns rubber as he nurses aching loins. Sick.

10. Smokescreen- This episode is about POLLUTION. As we all know, there is a massive pollution making factory right down the road from Degrassi (no there isnt), but in the Degrassi world its there. Basically the Degrassi environmental team meets after school all the time to discuss amongst other things the Environment. Rick the bad seed decides to join the team because he cares.. Kathleen gives him a real hard time, but Ricky doesnt mind. Caitlin and Rick get together to work on a project to advertise the environment club to Degrassi.. but how will they get their message across? Oh I know.. how about a really horrible 80's rap. How can we make this even worse? Why not pass the mic to a teenage white girl named Caitlin. Sad. And finally what could make this already sad plot sadder? The fact that when the rap is played over the school PA system the students get into it.. they love it! Joey can be seen grooving to the pathetic beats. For shame. The other story in this episode is that of Yick. All the kids have to do a presentation on something they know.. Yick knows nothing, and no one would be interested in hearing about his family since they are all boat people immigrants. So what does he do? Well he finds a Vase that looks like its Chinese and really old.. he passes it off as just that, and Arthur buys it. When returning his school pants (or something) Yick leaves his bag unattended with Arthur in a class room.. Artie knocks the bag to the floor and the vase breaks. OH NO. Arthur spends the rest of the episode hiding it away from Yick.. saying its being appraised for its value. Yick knows its worth nothing. Arthur thinks its worth alot. Its ironic! Finally the truth comes out, because Arthur cant fix the busted vase. Yick tells him its really not worth anything. "You broom head" curses Arthur. Yick tells him to watch his mouth.. there are children around. Meanwhile, Caitlin and Rick get a petition together to end the pollution , and take it to the nearby factory. ITs neat to see how they did this.. the shots i mean.. since there isnt a factory near Degrassi. Anyways, the guy inside the factory is less than helpful and talks down at the children making Rick really mad. In the end nothing changes.. ahh to be young again and think that a piece of paper with 50 badly signed names can do diddly squat.

11. It's Late!- Whats late? Wheels pizza? Michelle's parents getting home from work? NO. Spikes period! Anyone with a girlfriend knows the fun it is when you reach the end of the month and she hasnt gotten her period yet... most guys anyway. One guy that didnt is Shane. Spikes giving everyone attitude because of her missing monthly friend.. and Shane takes it personally. "I thought we were going steady" says Shane. Spike tells him the truth and Shane actually gives an accurate performance to a guys reaction to the comment "I think im going to have a baby", he backs away slowly, making faces of disbelief. Heather and Erica lend their support to Spike... Erica tells Spike that its impossible to get pregnant the first time, Heather tells her sister that she is an idiot..but idiot or not, the sisters take Spike to get a pregnancy test from Shoppers Drug Mart (a very awesome drug store). Previously, Spike overheard her mother and some friends talking about how silly it is to get pregnant when you are young (or something), so Spike is obviously dead when she tells her mother. Anyway, she comes home with the pregnancy test kit in a bag (why wouldnt you put it in your backpack you dumbass if you didnt want to get caught?) Her mother demands to know what she is carrying, and after some crying Spike finally shows her mother... "You didnt" her mother whispers. Oh she did, and with Shane! I dont know what I would be more upset with. I guess Shane didnt pull out in time. Meanwhile, Yick wants to ask Melanie out.. but how does will he do it? read a book? watch a film? how about ask the stud with the plan: Arthur. Arthur gives Yick lots of ideas.. ask her out after a compliment: your eyes are as blue as swimming pools. Yick that crazy immigrant messes up and says "pimming swools". Next give her flowers: she is alergic to them. Finally he just asks her and they go have a great time ice skating. Spike is pregnant. Shane looks very noble, but he isnt. Man hes only what.. 13 years old? I was worried about my braces back then, but at least Shane knows "his boys can swim"

12. Parents' Night- Wheels might get molested. Thats what we are led to believe at the start of this episode.. but its really just Mike, Wheels biological father who is back after 13 years of playing in a local rock band "Mike and the Penile Acne Poppers" (or something). The conflict between Shane and Spike gets critical and they break up (hey did you forget that she has your fetus Shane?) Spike thinks about what she can do.. she could give it away.. she could get an abortion.. she could have it. We find out that Shane is pro-life, even though he is dumping her and doenst have to give birth he thinks he still has the right to an opinion. The Zit Remedy still in its infancy talks about names for the band.. Snake and the charmers? Joey and the JoyBuzzers. Wheels is the middle man.. he doesnt really care, he just wants to jam. Outside his school, Mike confronts Wheels about who he really is. Wheels has just had his hand cut off, and is standing on the edge of a small platform.. below him.. a dark pit. Mike says "Your parents never told you the truth.. I am your father" Wheels: "No thats not true.. thats impossible.." Anyway, Wheels believes Mike and takes his phone number, later they get together.. but Wheels gets pissed off at him for saying "hey this is my kid". Well its true wheels, take a chill pill. The 2 agree to not talk to eachother for "a bit".

13. Revolution!-

Season 2

14.Eggbert- Spike takes some classes that teach her how to care for a baby, and what better way to illustrate this point than to take care of an egg for a week. Spike lets Shane take care of the egg for a while (so she can go to a party) and Shane decides that he wants to go to the party also and brings the egg. At the party Shane whips the egg around and has a gay ole' time.. Spike gets pissed off, and breaks the egg in anger (ooo).

15. A Helping Hand- One of my favorite episodes of all time! The episode starts with Mr Raditch out of commission in the hospital with appendicitis. The kids start bragging that they make fun of all substitute teachers.. and cant wait to see who is teaching them this time. Its Mr. Colby! According to the girls, Colby is attractive. He looks like a molester to me. And guess what!. On the side, L.D has taken over for Voula, as Lucy's makeover project. L.D gets made up and looks hideous.. complete with makeup and clothing. She thanks Lucy for the outfit, and after she is out of eyesight from Lucy, she takes off the clothing and makeup. Way to go! what a waste of Lucy's time. Mr. Colby starts getting very friendly with Lucy. He gives her an A on her paper that she wrote detailing her friend Voula moving away. Turns out Mr. Colby can relate.. as he has been through a bad divorce. Sure, a kid named Voula moving away is the same thing as a divorce. Meanwhile, Wheels is getting headaches and has vision problems.. uhoh! time for Wheels to wear specs. Not only specs, but Wheel's is having trouble and needs extra help after school from Miss Avery. This interferes with the Zit Remedy's practice schedule. Joey and Snake cant wait, and find that Simon can play about as good as AC/DC's bassist Cliff Williams (aka sucky). But to them, hes gold. Colby continues his seduction and during a class discussion, L.D spots Colby checking out Lucy's chest. Later L.D tells Lucy what happened, and Lucy takes this as L.D is jealous. Colby manages to get Lucy alone in the classroom, and he tries his  best to seduce her. Touching, complementing. Lucy is horrified... L.D was right the whole time! Lucky for her Wheels forgot his books and saves the day. Colby tries to convince Lucy that nothing happened, and she tells him off. Wheels offers his help should Lucy need any witness help in reporting the shoulder touching molester.

16.Great Expectations- Joey gets the wrong signals in a big way in this action packed episode of Degrassi Junior High! Liz is a new student at Degrassi (even though she appeared in the first episode of season 1). She has a shaved head, and an attitude problem when she first arrives at Degrassi. She is from out of town and didnt want to move in the first place. Her mom is a big mover and shaker in the job world (shes a waitress) and I guess goes where the money is. How a single mom/waitress can afford a house in downtown Toronto is beyond me!. Joey thinks that just because Liz dresses like a punk and laughs at his jokes.. it means that he has full access to score with her. Meanwhile, Arthur is growing up and is having wet dreams. Perhaps he did end up seeing Swamp Sex Robots after all? He thinks he is a sex maniac because he has a wet dream a week. Lucky for him that Sue from "The Sunday Night Sex Show" exists in this Degrassi Universe, only she is named Sally. Melanie is talking about listening to "Dr. Sally" and Yick and Arthur overhear the conversation. Finally, someone who can tell Arthur he will grow up to be a shaved headed/full bearded hideous bartender! (or that he is totally normal by having wet dreams). My favorite scene in Degrassi plays out next as Joey shops for condoms in the local Shoppers Drug Mart. Picking up everything in the store just so he can blend a pack of condoms is just genius. Old people and annoying Shoppers Drug Mart employees are at every turn. Im pretty sure that the worker who observed Lucy stealing clothes with Voula in the season one episode "What a night!" has gotten a new job.. as annoying condom price checking woman in this episode. Poor Joey... all he wants to do is pick up a pack of prophylactics.. and everyone has to bust his balls. The condoms should be on special.. the cashier tells him. Joey just wants out of there. Everyone is looking at him and making fun of him for being so young (to turn this around, Joey could just say that he will be getting some boobie.. and that they are jealous). Once Joey is out of there he makes it over to Liz's house. After a short while, Joey lays it on the line. He wants to. Liz wants to. Lets do it. Poetry. Sheer Poetry. Liz showing obvious signs of molestation in this episode flips and kicks Joey out. In the end, Joey reveals that he really liked Liz.. and that he blew it.

17.Dinner and a Show- Degrassi was really good at awkward moments realized. Who could forget the time that Wheels and a date of Stephanie K's mom showed up at the same doorstep for two separate dates.. only to have Stephs mom recognize Wheels as the boy who bought condoms from her.. and then put 2 and 2 together that he was there for her slut daughter!. This episode is no exception to that general awkward moment feel. Yick likes Melanie. They went on a date before and he wants to keep trying. Melanie doesnt see Yick this way.. just as friends. Yick doesnt get this vibe, and instead asks Melanie out on a date. He wants to see Revenge of the Lizard (or something), she wants to see Stealing Magnolias (or something). Yick decides that he will go to see the chick flick (wow hes desperate). Melanie wants a real man.. someone like Snake. On the other side of town, Shane and his stuck up religious nut father argue over what will become of Shane and the baby (one miss Emma Nelson). Shanes dad wants him to go to Oats Military Academy (excellent!) but Shane wants nothing to do with this. The McKay's also want to meet Spike and her mom finally.. since they are kinda joined together now. The 2 families get together at a dinner that is pretty awkward itself. Spikes mom orders a Bailey's on the rocks! nice choice. The 2 families do not get along, and I feel like punching Shane's parents. Shane ends the scene by saying that he wants to take care of the baby and do the right thing. Note to Shane: dont take acid and jump off a bridge. Back in the Yick/Melanie world, Melanie gets asked out on a date from Snake.. her dreamboat! She accepts.. and ditches Yick. Yick is hurt, but decides to go see Revenge of the Reptiles with Arthur. Guess what: Melanie and Snake are going to the same movie. For added fun, Joey and Wheels show up to harass Snake on his date. The entire thing explodes when Yick catches Melanie with Snake and thus another awkward moment in the Degrassi Universe is realized. Fin.

18.Stage Fright-Caitlin now has epilepsy.. didnt you know? I dont seem to remember this being mentioned before.. but we (the viewers) are meant to already know this!

19. Fight- Stage Fright, followed by an episode named Fight? Wacky. In this episode we learn that it is not wise to make fun of those who can inflict physical pain on you. After getting pushed off his skateboard by Duane, Joey decides to bite his lip instead of facing a beating. Later in the bathroom, Joey brags to Wheels and Snake that Duane is in 8D.. D for dumb.. and that he is basically a weenie. Duane is actually taking a pretty painful bowel movement and overhears the entire conversation. Trouble. The word trickles down that Joey is in deep shit, and Joey is confronted by Duane who tells him that there will be a fight.. hey we have all been there! In grade 7, a bully named Mark Mullin threatened to kick my ass since i turned him in to the principal for something he did. This piece of crap kid stole away a girl I was slowly wooing. Ohh Crystal Norris, why did you have to go off with Mark Mullin. Was it because I wore sweatpants? Is it because he had facial hair in grade 7 ? (dont forget that he failed a few times..) The last laugh was on him as I saw him in grade 12. He was the same height. Smoking at an early age is not a good idea (to bring us back to Degrassi.. see Rick who is 5 foot 2 as an adult). Oh, and I got out of the fight by getting picked up by my friends dad. Chicken? hey I like chicken. Joey thinks about avoiding the fight, but in the end shows up and gets his ass handed to him by Duane. It was good that he showed up, and got alot of respect from the other kids.

20. Bottled Up- Doesn't everyone have an alcoholic family member that ends up embarrassing the hell out of you and your friends? well maybe everyone doesn't.. but one person that does is Kathleen! Known for being a prude, and a bitch, Kathleen may act this way because of her disgusting mother who is a big alcoholic. In this episode, the kids win a chance to be on a local game show called "Quest For The Best". Back in 1987, not everyone had a VCR. The kids need someplace to watch a previous Quest For The Best episode that Miss Avery had on tape. VCR's. Caitlin has one.. but her family is visiting. Nancy should have one..then she could watch "Sweatin to the oldies" performed by her hero.. Richard Simmons. Tim doesn't have one. That leaves Kathleen.. only one problem: her mom will be home and is a drunk. The kids come by to watch the tape, and Kathleen's drunk mom stumbles down the stairs and embarrasses Kathleen to high heaven. The kids all leave.. leaving Mrs Meade babbling on about how the kids were boring. Meanwhile Scooter and his instant best friend Max decide that Rick is the coolest kid at Degrassi and they want to be like him. Rick smokes, therefore to be cool.. they must also smoke. They decide on a perfect spot to try smoking out. A place where they wont get caught.. and that no one will find them. The back of a building? or a forest? no.. the boys washroom. Inside Degrassi. Smart. They start coughing and decide that they wont smoke again. The kids arrive for the taping of Quest For The Best and find that Kathleen is missing her DJH sweater. She will look awful on camera without it! her drunk mom was supposed to bring it.. but ends up missing the taping.. and throwing Kathleen into a confused state. Nancy the fat chick is annoying as ever in this episode. She cant answer any questions and puts the pressure on Kathleen to perform. Rick yells out "come on" which snaps Kathleen back to reality and thus wins Degrassi the game.

21. Sealed with a Kiss- Erica (the erotic twin) wants to kiss a guy.. badly.

22. Dog Days-Stephanie wants to kill herself. Her tooth hasnt grown in yet, and frankly.. she is depressed.

23. Censored- Spike is pregnant. Parents feel that because of this, their daughters will get knocked up. Spike must leave Degrassi!

24. Trust Me- Snakes parents go away to attend a barmitzfah, and leave Snake in charge of the house.. with their crappy car in the driveway! A sleepover happens, and Wheels, Joey, and Snake take the family shit box out for a drive.. even though they are underage and not licensed!

25. He's Back- Who is back you say? The arm touching molester Mr. Colby!. Lucy starts having nightmares of having her arm touched.. its very troubling you see, because when your arm is touched.. it is worse that your private parts. I think if Degrassi wanted to REALLY get the point across of girls being molested they should've actually did something a little more "normal" of molesters.. but lets be frank, Mr. Colby only touched Lucy and Susie's arms.. I agree that he is a bastard, but they should've done a little more. Susie gets her necked touched also, and in the end Lucy, Wheels (who does nothing in this episode) L.D, and Susie all band together and tell Mr. Lawrence what happened. Colby however already skipped town.. perhaps knowing the shit was about to hit the fan

26. Pass Tense- Wheels is freaked out that he will fail. Joey tries to tell him that its not a big deal. The joke ends up on Joey when he flunks.

Season 3

27.Can't Live With 'Em (Part 1)-

28. Can't Live With 'Em (Part 2)- Part two of this sad episode. Wheels parents are dead, and the episode begins with basically the entire class attending the funeral (Raditch said it was for close personal friends only..). Joey tries to call Wheels over the weekend to apologize.. Wheels doesn't let him. The Grandparents want Derek to move in with them, get a social worker, and allow them to boss him around. Lucy begins her adventures with Paul (you know the nerdy black guy). Lucy shafts L.D (they were supposed to go to the movies together). Wheels come back to school and gets mad at Joey and beats him up (as well as breaking the Zit remedy demo tape). Kathleen shafts Melanie due to Kathleen’s over zealous presidential campaign. Shane begins to pay Spike baby money (or whatever its called).. ohh 5 bucks every now and then.. that should get Emma into college.

29. A Big Girl Now- Lucy and L.D talk about what it would be like to have sex, and L.D reminds Lucy not to forget her mystical soccer game. Lucys relationship with Paul the nerd black guy heightens.. Joey and Wheels talk about his feelings, and Wheels quits the band. Snake is still having problems saying a word to his "friend" Wheels. Kathleen loses the election against Nancy Kramer (thus becoming vice president).. Alex Yankou becomes the school treasurer, and I think Luke becomes Sports guy. Lucy shafts all her friends by saying she has to go to her grandmas house to mow the lawn.. when really she is having a party at her OWN house!. Snake finally says that he is sorry to Wheels near the end of this episode, and they go to have some fries. At Lucys party Paul puts the moves on Lucy, but she doesnt allow him to hump.. Paul lies to everyone saying he had sex with Lucy, and we all know this is a fib. At Degrassi everyone "knows" that Lucy and Paul did it.. so the rumor spread evvverywhere.

30. Season's Greetings- This has to be one of the cheapest Degrassi episodes ever made. This is one of the episodes that I had never ever seen until I saw it on Showcase. Arthur and Yick exchange gifts at lunch time.. and Yick says Arthur is rich, thus pissing Artie off and they begin the episode long fight. Louella? the lesbian-esque janitor is having problems fixing the Degrassi furnace.. everyone is boiling hot. Arthur cousin Dorothy tries to patch shit up between the 2 buds, and in the end finally succeeds. Spike brings her newly hatched baby in to visit everyone in the school, Shane doenst know what to feel.. Joey invites Wheels and his family (just the grandparents) to Christmas dinner. The rest of the episode revolves around Arthur and Yick flashbacks of their old adventures.. rehashing old material to cover up the fact that this is a lousy episode.

31. Loves Me, Loves Me Not- The Zit remedy attempt to sell their brand new album.. complete with 1 song, and flash packaging. Caitlin attempts to win over Joeys heart by picking up a copy of the tape. Joey and Caitlin have to work on a project together doing a film review, and they go to see Teen Academy IV.. they both get A's on the project. Michelle and Alexa talk about wanting BLT's pants or something.. and they decide that it would be cool if the four of them all went and had a picnic together (Blt, Simon,alexa.. etc), but instead of helping Michelle out with her love for BLT she goes for BLT and this makes Michelle see red. A dance happens and Joey says he will "see" Caitlin at the dance..so she thinks its basically a date, but it isnt and Joey has no interest in the lovely Caitlin. She leaves early crying (aww) and breaks the Zit remedy tape in anger.

32. He Ain't Heavy..- This episode's title is really retarded, I dont understand what it supposed to mean. Is Snakes brother fat? no.. are they talking about Nuclear water? No.. so whats the deal? No idea!. Snake starts the episode in a class where Mr. Garcia (you know the fat black guy) is showing the class how easy it is to get aids.. so Snake has aids in the class and everyone starts calling him a homo. Snake would rather play basketball over doing the Zit Remedy thing (for shame). Joey decides to take the tape to a radio station called C-RAZ (crazy.. how witty) in hopes of them playing the album and making them famous.. it doesnt work, and Joey instead gets a job as a janitor at the station. Snakes long lost brother Glenn stops by for a visit while the guys are playing basketball with their shirts off (this will come into play later why he was smiling so much). Glenn has come to tell the parents of Snake a big secret.. he is a homo (err gay), Snake is crushed; his cool brother! how could he be "one of those guys"?. Since his brother is gay, Snake doesnt take the shit about having aids/being gay at school very well.. so he starts fights, and gets angry with everyone. His brother Glenn is no longer considered a son anymore, and leaves in a huff.. Snake feels bad and says sorry. Lucy who had been the butt of rumors about having sex with Paul finally confronts him and makes him say they didnt pork.. LD is thankful

33. The Whole Truth-The poor monkey! Liz somehow becomes an expert in animal rights, and knows all kinds of crap about protests. She enlists the talents of Caitlin to the cause of animal rights, and specifically testing on monkeys. No one believes that Joey will get the tape played on C-Raz radio, or that he works there (little do they know that he does work there.. cleaning the toilets). Caitlin becomes really obsessed with the animal crap, and wants to write an article in the digest telling everyone all about the horrors of monkey tests... after doing some research she finds out that the whole truth behind animal rights isnt as simple as she thought it would be. Without animal rights she would have problems with Epilepsy still.. so she decides not to go "ape" of the money issue like Liz wanted her too.

34. Star-Crossed-After breaking up with Paul in the last episode, Lucy is still being pursued him.. he doesnt get the point. Clutch tells him that "chicks are a dime a dozen". In a galaxy far far away Erica and Heather read up on astrology and find out that they will get some loving because its a full moon or something. Erica decides she wants to go out with Clutch because his car is so sparkly and shiny. Clutch hears about this and thinks that Heather was the one who asked him out.. so they decide to go bowling. Erica gets pissed off at her sister and even calls her a "witch!" The make up a plan about how they can switch (Clutch isnt a dummy, he can see that one has bad teeth and one doesnt). Erica has a dentist appointment! trouble? NO! Erica starts the date.. Heather takes over in between.. then Erica comes back and finishes the date. Wheels and Snake are walking through Borden high and someone says "why dont you go have tea with your mom" and this makes Wheels pissed off because his mom is dead. He charges the guy and gets sent to the principals office. At the date between Clutch and Erica, Clutch kinda falls for Lucy.. and the two hit it off big time. No love for Erica

35. Food For Thought- Kathleen is such a fat ass isnt she? Well that is what she thinks, so she goes on a crash diet: walking really fast to burn calories, eating no food, and barfing up all that fattening bile!. Alexa thinks she is fat also, so she goes on a diet also. Erica and Heather are doing a project at the science fair on "Anorexia", so they are the experts on food and not eating. While at Kathleen's house (with the drunken freak mother) Melanie reads Kathleen's diary and sees all the crap about "I must not eat, I must barf, I must do exercise!". Caitlin while walking with Melanie mutters something about Kathleen "Shes the wicked witch of Degrassi" MEOW! cat fight!. At the science fair Melanie and Kathleen's project on the ozone layer gets 4th place, and Kathleen is so crushed that she passes out. Miss Avery gives her mouth to mouth and a faint smile can be seen on Kathleen's face.. no just kidding, but she has a problem. Melanie was only trying to help her out, but instead Kathleen "hates" Melanie (that lasts about one minute).

36. Twenty Bucks- UPDATED Melanie gets her braces off and to celebrate this big occasion she throws a pizza party for her cheap friends. She has earned 20 bucks babysitting, and blows it all on pizza and drinks. BLT bets Joey that he cant get a date by Friday night, Joey accepts the bet. and then finds out that he is supposed to wait in line for Gormet Scum with Snake on Friday night. Snake wants to ask Melanie  to go with him to the Gormet Scum concert. but since Snake knows he will not be "Scoring" with Melanie, he requests that she buy her own ticket.(trouble.. she is broke!). None of Melanie's friends want to lend her the money because she never pays them back, so Melanie steals 20 bucks from her loving mother (what a bad apple). Joey spends the rest of the episode asking every available mama at Degrassi if they want to go out with him (so he can win the bet), his last mama is the greatest mama of all time.. Caitlin! (she accepts). Melanie feels bad about stealing the 20 bucks because her mom cant by tampons now (or something), so she comes clean and gets grounded forever. She tells Snake that she cant go to the concert, and overhears that Spike wants to go to the concert (which is now sold out)... Melanie sells Spike the ticket and everyone is happy.. oh what about Joey and Caitlin? Well Joey wins the bet, but Caitlin finds out that their date was just part of a bet with BLT. With the 20 bucks in Joey's hand, Caitlin is pissed and takes a cup of pop and pours it all over Joey's head! she storms out of the restaurant they were in, and Joey follows. It conveniently starts to rain, and they both get soaked. Joey apologizes and says that sure there was a bet.. but that he really does like her. To prove this, he rips up the 20 dollar bill. Caitlin accepts. 

37. Taking Off (Part 1)- I dont actually have this episode on tape yet (cause I forgot to tape it ok!) but I do have part 2 on tape, and at the start of said episode it has a summary of part 1, so that is what I will go on because my memory on it is a little fuzzy. Luke and Shane drop acid, and Shane drops off a bridge. Wheels decides he is going to see his birth dad (rock and roll Mike) in Port Hope.. the reason behind this? Mike sent Wheels a postcard saying that he was playing some shows there.. and having alot of groupies, so many groupies that he needed some extra guys to take advantage of the chicks.. so Wheels hitchhikes up north and is picked up by an official homo, who "feels up" Wheels by touching his legs..Wheels jumps out and gets a rock ready to strike if the homo tries anything more, he doesnt. Wheels arrives in Port Hope. Luke is questioned by the cops about the disappearance of Shane Mckay.

38. Taking Off (Part 2)- "He doesnt do that stuff, I dont know anyone who does that stuff" -Luke.
What a bad liar that Luke is.. did you see the face he was making? What a horrible liar, and to lie to a police man! biggg trouble Luke. Wheels's grandma is on the prowl in this episode.. what an annoying old bag! She hassles the hell out of Snake (crying on the phone) pleading for him to tell where Wheels has gone too, and she also does the same thing to Joey. Joey however cracks under the pressure when the old battle-ax comes in to Degrassi and asks him where he is "Please Joey.. he is my only grandchild..please" Damn! I wouldve told her to go massage the grandpa. When Wheels arrives at Port Hope, he dreams about how his dad will greet him "Wheels you still play bass? maybe you can be in our band!". But when his dad greets him in real life it is less than what he imagined. Turns out that Mike the biological dad has a girlfriend who is pregnant! but this time he is going to keep the baby (this makes Wheels feel like crap), again Mike refers to Wheels as "thats Derek.. my kid" Personally I hate when people refer to their children as "kids" it just sounds wrong, but on with the episode summery. Luke is again hassled by the damn pigs (cops) and this time he cant keep his bad lying face up.. he cracks and tells the cops that "maybe he did some acid" when it was all Lukes fault (what a bad apple). Mike the rock and roll dad makes Wheels call his grandparents to tell them he is alright, but Mike doesnt want Wheels around.. and Mikes girlfriend doesn't want him around either. After Joey spills the beans about Wheels, the grandma comes to Port hope and drags him away..Wheels comes back to school and thats all.

39. Making Whoopee- NEW This may be the only Arthur centric episode in the Degrassi Universe. Sure he has had episodes that revolve around him before (swamp sex robots, wet dreams, and Phil the dog (which of course does not make any appearances) but this episode is a topic that certainly should be covered. That topic? Divorced parents porking new people. Arthur has a great relationship going on with his dad.. they are both single.. both fat.. and both into watching "Space Cadets". In-between playing practical jokes on each other (whoopee cushions, fake vomit etc) the truth comes out that Dad is hooking up with "Carol" a lady friend from work. "See you later old buddy" his dad tells him. I guess I lied, meanwhile at Degrassi Junior High, Snake is still hung up on Melanie and wants to hang out with her at the Schools upcoming open house. Allison meanwhile has other plans, and wants the "hunk" Snake all to herself. Snake still is hung up on Melanie. Luke confronts Tim about visiting Shane in the hospital, he wants some info on how Shane is doing.. but doesn't want to go to the Hospital himself.. perhaps he is ashamed? Tim throws a hissy fit. Arthur reveals for the first time (I believe only on the PBS cut of the episode) that he will be going to France in the summer. This would explain the horrible beret that Arthur wears in Degrassi High. The next morning Arthur discovers Carol naked in her fathers bed and throws a fit. He confronts his dad later saying his dad doesnt need Carol, and that they have each other. His dad basically tells him that he cant have sex with Arthur, and that he has needs that his fat son cant fulfil. The tension reaches the boiling point when Arthur's dad arrives for the Degrassi open house WITH Carol. Oh no! Arthur throws a publically verbal fit, calling out Carol, and saying they don't need her.. the end result is Carol dumping Arthur's dad. Arthur cock-blocked his own father. How shameful.

40. Black & White- See this was another episode I had never seen until it came to Showcase. Too bad for me, when this episode aired Showcase was having a bad day.. and the first 3 mins of the version I saw got all eaten up by the Showcase VCR. From what I can gather BLT was walking around in Borden high with his main squeeze Michelle when some bad seed calls BLT the "n-word". if you know what I mean. BLT gets in a fight, and is then taken away by some teacher.. and gets a warning "Next time I get suspended". BLT asks Michelle to the dance, but Michelle's racist parents wont let her go.. sighting that she is too young or something. One of the strange things about this episode is this: Who the hell is playing Michelle's dad? he looks like he is 80 years old! and whats with calling BLT "colored" wasn't that term used back in the 20's? Well I guess this is when the guy playing Michelle's father was young. In keeping with the discrimination theme of this show, Spike is finally getting a job, and when she arrives at the place where her job is the guy makes fun of her hair (what do you do to get that kinda hair.. stick your finger in an electrical socket?), then saying she is too late and cannot have the job, Spike gets mad and storms out of the place. Liz the crazy punker calls him a pig and then says "Im gonna come back here later tonight and throw a rock through his window" This made me laugh.. way to go Liz!.

41. Pa-arty!- A party at Degrassi? you betcha! This time Alexa is having a big party and everyone is going. The grade 8's (Melanie, Kathleen etc..) want to go, but they are not invited. Joey gets a fake I.D for 5 bucks ("it looks fake" says Wheels) and conceives a plan with Snake and Wheels to get some beer for Alexa's big shindig, but then Alexas parents wreck everything by not allowing her to party.. Lucy saves the day by inviting everyone over to her house (her parents are away again..), but since she doesnt want to be around Clutch alone (because he gets wacky when he is drunk) she tells him that a) there is no party and b) she wants to study instead of going with him. Snake is enlisted to buy the beer because he looks older. Joey puts a hat on him,  an overcoat, gloves, and finally a tie and tells him to go get some beer. Armed with the fake ID (Mr. Bertram) he is told to get simply a "2-4" and once inside the beer store, that is exactly what he asks for.. so of course the plan fails . The dudes then spend the next part of the episode begging older people in the parking lot to buy them beer.  Joey finally asks Clutch who somehow can get beer because his I.D is better, Clutch agrees, and for the "buying" fee, Clutch takes 6. Joey, Wheels and Snake take the remaining 18 beers and start walking towards Lucy's party. Somewhere along the way, the beer starts to get heavy, so the boys need a break. Joey and Snake drink up, but Wheels passes (hey his parents were killed by a drunk driver after all!) just as things cant get any better they get worse.. COPS FIND THEM! and they get in deep shit. They dont make it to the party, and thus Caitlin and Melanie are effectively stood up at the Grade 9's party. Lucy's parents end up coming home early, and the party ends.. followed by a few moments later Clutch and Carl (Paul) show up  drunk, after hearing about the new party at Lucys house. Clutch makes an ass of himself, and tries to fondle Lucy. Carl does nothing, and Lucy is left with no alternative but to knee little Clutch.. killing his libido instantly.

42. Bye-Bye Junior High- NEW The historic last episode of Degrassi Junior High. Everyone is trying to hook up a date for the last dance of the year. Joey desperately (really really desperately) wants Caitlin to go with him to the dance.. only she is still peeved after being stood up at Lucy's party. Doesnt she know that they were busted for underage drinking? The actual Degrassi building is having some serious issues.. the fire alarms are going off non stop.. the boiler is having issues.. and all throughout the episode are people in hazmat suits (WTF?) hauling around containers that say "Flammable". Uhoh. One of the workers can even be heard saying "This place needs alot of work".  I dont know about you, but when I was in grade 8 I just loved playing tag with a girl like Tessa Campinelli. I wasnt interested in banging her, I just wanted to run around the school like a retarded kid saying "YOU'RE IT!" Of course I am lying, but in this episode the part of "me" will be played by Scooter. Scooter seems to have taken a break from tossing Bartholomew Bond's salad and is focusing his attention on Tessa. The other students in the school are disgusted by this behavior.. often referring to the love birds as "stupid little kids".  Joey is having problems of his own. If any of his marks are "UNDER a B" he will not be able to go to the dance.  The exams are finished, and the marks are given. Wheels just barely passes, but the math pimp gives him a break since his PARENTS DIED.  Joey on the other hand has done phenomenally well... but he got a C in French (ca va Mal!) and instead of explaining things clearly to Caitlin.. just tells her that he cant go to the dance. She gets pissed off as usual. Spike has done crappy with her exams, Miss Avery takes the time to deliver her report card directly to Spike at her moms hair salon. Miss Avery tries to get Spike to make up her marks in correspondence courses over the summer. Spike wont have it.. she blames Emma, and wants to drop off. Miss Avery reveals a little something about herself, shes barren. Spike wishes she had never had Emma, and that its the babies fault!  "You count your blessings young lady!..at least you can have a baby..not all of us are that lucky you know!" BURN ON SPIKE. She later decides to take the extra courses.. and Miss Avery is happy. The dance begins, Caitlin is fashionable late as usual.. Arthur somehow has scored a date with Kathleen (haha.. but no.. its not because hes rich) and Wheels for some reason is with L.D.  Tessa Campinelli and Scooter continue their retarded game of tag, taking it this time down into the basement of Degrassi where they discover a fire in the furnace room! OH NO! and the FLAMMABLE CONTAINERS ARE CONVENIENTLY PILED DIRECTLY BESIDE THE SOURCE OF THE FIRE. The kids run upstairs and warn everyone of a fire. No one believes them of course with the constant false alarms.. but whats this? the effects budget has gone through the roof! explosions are heard.. and the kids stampede outside screaming.. Caitlin frantically is looking for Joey! oh no!! he's obviously dead!! no he just forgot his jacket inside. Some beauty effects are shown of the school burning down. All the grade 9 kids who spent the episode complaining about the school and saying "I cant wait to be out of here.." "Bye bye Junior High!" etc are now heard saying "Im gonna miss this school". Burn baby burn! - See you all at Degrassi High !